Today on the Successful Barrister Podcast, cohosts Marc Whitehead and Diana Berry discuss the value of talking to yourself. They start off by discussing closed and growth mindsets as described in Carol Dweck’s book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, and how you can develop a growth mindset. Next, Marc and Diana discuss affirmations (or “pep talks,” as Marc prefers to call them), explain why they work, and give examples of their own. Learn how to develop a growth mindset and discover how affirmations can help you succeed.
For detailed show notes, navigate using the timestamps below:
[0:48] Marc Whitehead introduces himself, cohost Diana Berry, and the topic of today’s episode. This episode is about your mindset and how affirmations can improve it.
[2:42] The episode is influenced by the book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck. It proposes that there are two mindsets: a closed mindset and a growth mindset. A growth mindset is the belief that skills and abilities can be developed through effort, while a closed mindset is the belief that skills are innate.
[5:13] To expand your vision and your talent, you have to expose yourself to new ideas. The growth mindset is something that you have to work toward.
[8:30] The next section of the episode is a “therapy session.” In July, Diana went to the PILMMA Mastermind in Asheville, and Diana came back with ideas for the firm. Marc was feeling left out because he was not able to go, and Marc responded to almost every idea with “that won’t work because…”
[11:07] When you’re under stress, you tend to revert back to a closed mindset. This is why Marc had such a negative reaction to Diana’s ideas.
[13:39] A better response would have been the sandwich method, or responding with a positive insight, followed by something negative, followed by something positive.
[17:30] Diana notes that if every idea your team brings to you is bad, the problem may actually be you. It is unlikely that every idea your team comes up with is terrible. This could be a sign that you are burnt out.
[19:24] On the other hand, team members might be able to recognize when people are having a bad day and choose not to share their more radical ideas on those days.
[21:07] Daily affirmations, or a “pep talk” as Marc likes to call it, can help change your mindset.
[25:06] For Diana, affirmations aren’t all stereotypical like “I am kind” and “I am strong.” One of her favorite affirmations for tough situations is “just because you can doesn’t mean you should.”
[26:40] Marc recently read The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) by Hal Elrod. The book discusses what makes an effective affirmation and includes guidelines on how to craft one. His tips are using present tense, staying positive, keeping it simple, including action words, and use feeling words to connect emotionally to your goals.
[28:29] One of Marc’s affirmations is “I consistently spot opportunities and utilize them, and new doors are always opening for me.” It reminds him of the saying Carpe Diem, which means seize the day.
[31:26] He also likes “I learn from the past, live in the now, and plan for the future.” This allows him to be present, but also speaks to the value of planning.
[32:43] Diana does a series of three affirmations that she started during a period where she had trouble sleeping. She also made a series of affirmations for her daughter. Her daughter has tried to make ones for Diana as well.
[34:33] Another of Marc’s is “I am always prepared, so luck favors me.” Marc says that everyone occasionally gets lucky, but only people who are prepared can utilize their luck. To take advantage of your luck, you have to be in a growth mindset.
Read Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck: https://www.amazon.com/Mindset-Psychology-Carol-S-Dweck/dp/0345472322
Listen to Mindset: The New Psychology of Success: https://www.audible.com/pd/Mindset-Audiobook/0593150422
Read The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) by Hal Elrod: https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Miracle-Morning-Updated-and-Expanded-Edition-Audiobook/B0CHZ5SG3Q
Listen to The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM): https://www.amazon.com/Miracle-Morning-Not-So-Obvious-Guaranteed-Transform/dp/0979019710
Visit the Successful Barrister website: https://www.successfulbarrister.com/
Visit the Marc Whitehead & Associates website: https://disabilitydenials.com/
Email Marc Whitehead: marc@marcwhitehead.com